I won't lie, after the exhilaration had passed about our then pending arrival, the shock set in that my life would never again be the same. You can go ahead and tell me kids will change your life for the better (which they do, as cliché as it sounds). But I couldn't help have a quiet, internalized panic attack. How do I work and mom, be a good partner and still have time to be me? Which I'm sure no mom has ever asked herself....ever.
I love what I do (most days). In fact it took a long time to get me to the point where I was ready to make my happy place into a career. I've worked hard to get here, and truth be told it feels like it's where I'm meant to be.
Now, being a Mom is pretty amazing. It's true. Dare I say it (*cringe*)....it's easier than I imagined. Granted our Little Man (touch wood) is pretty chill and that makes a world of difference. Just like his furry, 4-legged predecessor he comes everywhere with us —the parties, the restaurants, the weekend adventures the list goes on. We realize how lucky we are, and are bracing ourselves for the inevitable terror number 2 will bring...when the time comes.
It's always struck me that returning to work after a year away would be extremely anxiety ridden. After all you're not suddenly done being a parent after 52 weeks. So somewhere along the way, I made the decision that work would just be part of raising a child. Integrated from the beginning.
As I start to settle back into my work schedule, I get it, things won't be the same. I'm not naïve enough to think they would be. A juggle, most defiantly. But some how it seems like this has been the vision all along — working and moming hand in hand.